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  Did I Just Embarrass Myself?...

  Dicholas Chad Pansy

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  Did I just embarrass myself? (Probably, but let’s obsess over it for 12 hours.) 
  Welcome to the official handbook for people who replay every conversation they've ever had like it's a humiliating movie they didn’t consent to star in. 
  If you’ve ever: 
  ✔️ Rehearsed saying “here” before roll call. 
  ✔️ Changed grocery store lines to avoid small talk. 
  ✔️ Said “you too” when a waiter told you to enjoy your meal. 
  ✔️ Sent a text, reread it 27 times, and still panicked… 
  Congratulations! You may be entitled to financial compensation (just kidding, but you will find this book painfully relatable). 
  In Did I Just Embarrass Myself? (Probably, But Let’s Obsess Over It for 12 Hours), we’ll explore: 
  📌 The existential nightmare of casual goodbyes (“See you later”... but WILL you?). 
  📌 How to pretend you’re normal in a conversation (spoiler: you’re failing). 
  📌 The traumatic experience of picking up the phone. 
  📌 Why texting is just anxiety in digital form. 
  📌 The social death that comes when your joke lands flat in a group chat. 
  📌 How to leave a party without having to say goodbye 47 times. 
  This is not a self-help book. This is a documentation of your suffering, written by someone who also lies awake at night thinking about that one awkward thing they did in 2013. 
  You don’t need therapy. You need to read this book and laugh at how dysfunctional we all are.

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  The Brothers Crunk

  William Pauley III

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  "A perfect example of bizarro fiction...every line is littered with wild and imaginative ideas." – Fangoria MagazineBrothers Divey and Reynold Crunk are two traveling breakfast burrito salesmen trying to make a living in the post-apocalyptic world of Planet Japan. After discovering a mutilated robot corpse in the middle of the desert, Divey mysteriously transforms into something abominable, setting a bizarre series of events into motion. Reynold follows his brother into the dark underworld of Tokyo, where there are no rules and old video game accessories are used as real weapons. Please consult a doctor if you experience any of the following symptoms while reading: convulsions, eye or muscle twitching, altered vision, involuntary movements, disorientation, or loss of awareness.

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  Wotcha

  Kev Saunders

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  Wotcha'  a contraction of the 15th century English greeting 'what chere be with you?' Watcher n  a person who watches or observes somebody or something. A voyeur. Say WOTCHA! to Bart Raines, who's condemned forever to be a watcher after a childhood prank left his eyelid glued to his beloved telescope. Stuck with one eye that can't not see, he's turned voyeurism into a lucrative blackmail industry. Say WOTCHA! to former rock star, avid coke fiend, Richard 'Winston' Smith who's watched by millions  among them erstwhile school friend Bart, who's orchestrating revenge for Winston's teenage betrayal through the sinister global surveillance network he calls the Daisy Chain. Say WOTCHA! to high class whore Daisy Chains (neé Raines) and her teenage son Joe, who's abducted along with his girlfriend by a sinister 'Christian' cult, which leaves the kids to die, hogtied and helpless in a derelict drainage tunnel slowly filling with sewage. Watched by the world's media, Winston, Daisy and Bart reunite to use fame and the Daisy Chain to save two teenage lives  and their own souls  from the filth that's about to drown them. Wotcha! is a comic spit in the eye of born again zealots with a wink and a twinkle to the rest of us  but it's also deadly serious. Mining a rich seam of coalblack humour and sex, drugs and rock and roll, it starts on a bittersweet nostalgia trip and builds up to the pace of a thriller. CONTROVERSIAL STUFF? Its themes and explicit language make this a candidate for one of those 'parental advisory' stickers they put on CDs these days. Does that make WOTCHA! a book that people aged under sixteen shouldn't read? In the author's opinion  absolutely not. 'If rude words and references to sex, drugs and rock and roll upset you per se, this book's not for you. But if you believe, as I do, that a sense of humour is what separates "naughty" from "evil", I think you might enjoy this story, laugh at the funny bits, think about the serious bits and read the redemption between the lines.'

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  GOD IS NOT FAIR - Coming To...

  Joel A. Freeman

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  SO WHAT DID YOU EXPECT? 
  Sometimes life isn't fair, but we expect it to be. Why else would we be so angry and hurt when it isn't? 
  Written by Joel Freeman and read by Herman Veal, in a listener-friendly and thought-provoking style, Joel Freeman encourages readers to seek a greater understanding of their feelings of loss and grief through personal reflection. He also prompts discussion about their expectations of themselves, God and others. 
  This book is not filled with glib answers, which serve to drive honest strugglers into deeper disillusionment. Drawing on his years of experience in counseling people through their grief and suffering, Dr. Freeman provides a framework upon which can be found true, lasting peace and security. 
  Endorsed by Joni Eareckson Tada, Billy Graham, Paul Meier and others, "God Is Not Fair" presents helpful insights, poignant stories and touches of humor in revealing a biblical perspective on these questions. You are about to embark upon a remarkable journey. 
  ENDORSEMENTS: 
  When I became paralyzed in a diving accident, I felt that God owed me explanations. My questions were not unlike those of most people who suffer. With wit and disarming style, Joel Freeman helps us find at least some of those answers. 
      -- Joni Eareckson Tada, Author and Speaker 
  I was going through treatment for cancer and if one more person gave me some syrupy sweet, overly illustrated, "overly Job," candy coated, "shut-up-and-put-up-God-can-do-what-He-wants-so-you-have-no-right-to-feel-anger-or-grief-or-confusion" books I was going to go insane. Then I stumbled upon this book and it blew me away. It packs a powerful message that helps answer questions, but also helps you learn to deal with life’s problems. 
      -- Emma, a reader

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  A Comedy of Pretzels

  J.J. Boskin

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  When tradition twists with popular culture and lands on “people’s oral humor,” idealistic Reuben Lamberth finds himself in a mess. He is a young, progressive, inspired scholar teaching at a prestigious northeastern university, but his other unique self has another foot 
  planted secretly in the world of standup comedy as Josh Sandburg. His stage name is a composite of ‘joshing’ and the renowned American poet Carl Sandburg.
   
  Neither his fully tenured professor wife Byrra who is enmeshed in a cabal of women’s faculty; his tough minor gangster-hood father Solly; his staid sociology chairperson and conventional colleagues; nor his tyrannical University President Jeremiah Brittle have any idea that he performs in comedy clubs as Josh Sandburg. 
   
  Should he be outed, there is considerable doubt that he will be upgraded to the coveted position of tenure, and his marriage may suffer as well. Reuben wonders, Is it worth giving up academia and taking a flyer in the world of comedy culture? The finale in this novel reveals tantalizing internecine connections that land squarely the realm of people’s oral 
  humor.

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  How to get married for the...

  BARAKATH

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  HOW TO GET MARRIED FOR THE SECOND TIME. Fun and funny audio book.

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