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  Women I'm Not Married To

  Franklin P. Adams

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  Literary cohorts and members of the famous Algonquin Round Table, Dorothy Parker and Franklin P. Adams wrote two short books - "Men I'm Not Married To" and "Women I'm Not Married To" - to humorously contrast the experiences of both men and women meeting, dating...and then deciding NOT to marry various potential partners. Presented here is Adams' contribution: "Women I'm Not Married To," which features short descriptions in both prose and verse of these rejected mates.  Adams - a renowned wit and celebrated newspaper columnist - helped to launch Parker's career and they enjoyed a decades-long friendship.   This book is presented here in its original and unabridged format.

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  It Started With a Finger Up My...

  Sandy Curtis

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  "It Started with a Finger Up My A*se"  is not your typical prostate cancer memoir — it’s a brutally honest, unexpectedly funny, and a deeply human journey through a diagnosis millions of men face but few talk about. 
  You will get more solace from this prize-worthy, self-proclaimed masterpiece than any other book on the subject or your money back. (I didn’t mean that; I’m just making a point.) 
  I was diagnosed in 2024, and what followed was equal parts terrifying, ridiculous, painful, and oddly enlightening. This audiobook is filled with things you won’t hear in polite conversation, but probably should — from awkward intrusive exams and midnight fears, to German penis pumps and injections in a place they do not belong. Not forgetting conversations about Harry Potter, Ted lasso and porn. I know, strange. 
  You will laugh, maybe cry, and most definitely clench. It will also help you tackle those fears, especially in the dark moments when you feel very alone, of which there may be many.  But more than that, you'll find comfort, connection, and the raw truths no brochure will tell you. 
  It’s my hope that the raw and unfiltered truths will give you answers to the questions you didn’t know you needed to ask. 
  So, what do you do when confronted with cancer? You look it square in the face and laugh at it because sometimes that’s all you can do. This evil illness has so much power over us, and I think it’s time we took some of it back. 
  It Started with a Finger Up My A*se (which it did) is a book for everybody because that’s precisely who prostate cancer affects. 
  Listen, laugh and learn. Then pass what you know on to the next man, because unfortunately there will always be a next man.

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  The Flying Inn - A tale of...

  G K Chesterton

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  Progressive Islam takes over England, and two men go on the run with a barrel of rum and a wheel of cheese, intent on keeping English pub life alive. Packed with songs, satire, and style as only Chesteron could write."Perhaps prophetical more so than prosaic (and not at all in the sense Chesterton intended it) The Flying Inn is one of those books which should rank among the classics" - The Distributist Review"Chesterton said that the book he most enjoyed writing was The Flying Inn. He enjoyed creating the comical scenes as much as the polemical ones, the drinking songs as much as the bitter satire and the hard-edged debate. As the hero of the novel says, “It’s as innocent as Heaven and as hot as hell.” The novel is a vehicle for Chesterton to tee off against corrupt and ineffectual politicians who had not merely lost touch with common citizens but were actively taking away their basic rights and freedoms. Besides politicians, he also makes room on his skewer for journalists, textual critics, health gurus, idiot socialists and capitalist toadies. [...] the drinking songs in The Flying Inn [are] "true Temperance songs: temperance is about moderation not abstinence. Self-restraint and self-control are acts of freedom. Prohibition is not. Though drinking may be a caprice [...] it is a caprice that cannot be forbidden to a citizen, but can be forbidden to a slave.”And what are these drinking songs that came under such fire? Simply some of the dearest and most delightful poems that Chesterton or anyone else has ever written: The Song of Right and Wrong, The Song of the Dog Quoodle, Wine and Water, The Logical Vegetarian, The Good Rich Man, The Saracen’s Head, and The Rolling English Road."

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  Gone to Pieces: An unforgettable...

  Rachel Cosyns

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  'Fans of Meg Mason's Sorrow and Bliss will find this bittersweet tale right up their street' The Times 
  To Do: 
   
  • Learn to drive on motorways. 
  • Use above skill to run away to France. 
  • Begin new life in France under assumed name.Rebecca is a wife, mother and the author of an unmanageable number of to do lists. 
  Her attempts to coerce her life into something she has any hope of controlling are failing. Her family can’t manage without her but she’s starting to think they should. So she makes a decision. Only it doesn’t quite go to plan. 
  Rebecca finds herself in therapy with a doctor poking around in her brain, asking questions about her childhood. She wants to get better but that means telling someone how she feels. How she really feels. 
  She’s gone to pieces. Can she put herself back together? 
  'A moving, honest and raw debut that many women will relate to' The Sun 
  'Funny, moving and uplifting' Fabulous 
  'Gone to Pieces deserves to become a modern classic' My Weekly 
  ** 
  What readers are saying about Gone to Pieces: 
  'A modern-day Bell Jar' 
  ‘What made Gone to Pieces special for me as a reader, was the choice of protagonist – middle-aged wife and mother, Rebecca … proving that women over 50 are the ones who often have the most complex stories’ 
  ‘This was a really unusual read but loved it … Thoroughly enjoyable and unique book’ 
  ‘I loved that it’s based on a middle-aged woman struggling with her mental health as I don’t think this is covered often. I found Rebecca to be a really likable character and I was really rooting for her the whole way through.’ 
  Gone to Pieces is a dark yet humorous novel that delves into the complexities of marriage and impending divorce. It's a psychological exploration of a woman coming to terms with her new reality. 
  For fans of Catherine Newman (Sandwich), Liane Moriarty (What Alice Forgot), Melanie Cantor (Death and Other Happy Endings), Jane Fallon (Getting Rid of Matthew), and Marian Keyes (Again, Rachel). 
  HarperCollins 2024

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  Trip Tales - From Family Camping...

  Rosanne S. McHenry

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  What’s the wildest thing that ever happened to you during an outdoor adventure? 
  Did you accidentally set your boots on fire? Get attacked by hungry raccoons or investigated by a curious bear? 
  Ever roast marshmallows and almost set your camp on fire? How do you run from a tidal wave? 
  What’s it like to be a park ranger? What happens when you get bucked off a horse, dangled from a cliff, bitten by bloodthirsty horseflies, or fall smack-flat onto your butt while leading a group of people down a trail? 
  These hilarious and eye-popping adventures will capture your imagination and carry you right into the experience of what it's like to be an outdoor adventurer, camper, and park ranger. With vivid descriptions of our beautiful state and national parks, children and adults alike will laugh out loud reading these comical short stories. A fun beach read, or great stories for families to share, you will love this book! Chapter favorites include: The Stolen Picnic Table, Rain Forest Reveries, The Magic Pond, Tent Trailer Woes, Blue Poop, Cabin Life, Bears and Backpacking, and Ranger Rules to Live By. 
  Winner of the Next Generation Indie Book Awards (Gold Medal Finalist), Non-Fiction Authors Award (Silver Medal Winner), and the International Book Awards!

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  The Innocents Abroad

  Mark Twain

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  The Innocents Abroad – Mark Twain 
  What happens when sharp American wit collides with the grandeur of Old Europe and the mystique of the Holy Land? Enter the mind of Mark Twain, where curiosity is weaponized and tradition is gently—yet mercilessly—unraveled. 
  In The Innocents Abroad, Twain turns a simple travelogue into a brilliant social commentary. Through the lens of a transatlantic voyage undertaken by a group of American tourists, he scrutinizes the customs, ruins, and revered relics of the Old World. But this is no ordinary journal—it's a masterful blend of satire, observation, and unfiltered insight, where every monument becomes a metaphor, every encounter a mirror of national identity. 
  Join Twain and his fellow “innocents” as they marvel at the ruins of Rome, navigate the romantic chaos of Paris, and confront the solemn air of Jerusalem. Whether mocking the pomp of ancient architecture or capturing the wonder in a fleeting Mediterranean sunset, Twain’s voice oscillates between biting irony and genuine awe. 
  More than a travel memoir, this audiobook is a timeless interrogation of what it means to see the world—and oneself. Twain's critique of blind reverence and his celebration of independent thought feel as contemporary today as they did in the 19th century, resonating with modern listeners who seek both amusement and insight. 
  This immersive audiobook experience is brought to life by high-fidelity AI narration, designed to capture the nuance of Twain’s humor and the clarity of his prose—ensuring an accessible and engaging listen from start to finish. 
  Step aboard this unforgettable journey. Let Twain be your guide through foreign lands and familiar follies. Purchase now and rediscover the art of seeing with irreverence, intelligence, and a twinkle in the eye.

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