The rules change at 50! The New York Times–bestselling author and former SNL writer offers advice on living this stage of life with your dignity intact. If you or someone you know has just turned fifty, it’s time to accept that the rules of life have changed, and that fifty is not the new thirty for most of us. Leland Gregory understands the forgetful minds, sagging bodies, and flagging pride of his fellow middle-agers, and in 50 Things Not to Do after 50, he offers helpful—and hilarious—advice for combating the humiliations this stage of life can bring. In this lighthearted and sometimes painfully on-target book, you’ll learn that what we used to do in our twenties, thirties, and forties should be avoided at all costs from now on. For example, regardless of gender, under no circumstances should you ever . . . Attempt to wear leather pantsStart a story that involves a lot of names—you’ll forget most of them before the story is overStalk your high school sweetheart on Facebook; the person you had the hots for in 10th grade probably isn’t so hot anymoreGet drunk in Pamplona and decide to run with the bullsVolunteer to be a drug muleSay things like “fo’shizzle,” “whatev,” or “cray-cray”. . . And do we really need to mention thongs, Speedos, or jeggings? Leland Gregory, the New York Times–bestselling author of Stupid American History and America’s Dumbest Criminals, has been praised by Katie Couric as the “chronicler of Stupid America.”
'I really, really loved it' - Marian Keyes
'Absolute heaven - I am cackling out loud!' - Nina Stibbe
'The most exciting new heroine I've read in a very long time' - Katie Fforde
Shortlisted for the Comedy Women in Print Prize
Blessed adj. [pronounced bles-id]
The state of being blessed, often referring to a person, usually female, who lives a luxurious lifestyle funded by an older, often married partner, in return for sexual favours.
Young, beautiful and ambitious, Bontle Tau has Johannesburg wrapped around her finger. Her generous admirers are falling over themselves to pay for her Mercedes, her penthouse, and her Instagrammable holidays. It's a long way from the neighbourhood she started out in, and it's been far from easy.
Along with making sure she always looks fabulous - because people didn't sacrifice their lives in the freedom struggle for black women to wear the same cheap T-shirts they wore during apartheid - Bontle's also hustling to get her business off the ground. And if that wasn't enough, her ex is still refusing to sign their divorce papers. It's not that she stopped loving him, but he was just so stubborn about wasting his medical degree on treating the poor.
Yes, Bontle gets the blues from time to time, who doesn't, the shrink keeps wanting to talk about a past she's put firmly behind her. And what she doesn't think about can't hurt her, can it?
Low-life writer and unrepentant alcoholic Henry Chinaski was born to survive. After decades of slacking off at low-paying dead-end jobs, blowing his cash on booze and women, and scrimping by in flea-bitten apartments, Chinaski sees his poetic star rising at last. Now, at fifty, he is reveling in his sudden rock-star life, running three hundred hangovers a year, and maintaining a sex life that would cripple Casanova.
With all of Bukowski's trademark humor and gritty, dark honesty, this 1978 follow-up to Post Office and Factotum is an uncompromising account of life on the edge.
Lisa is a qualified dating and relationship expert with the kind of experience that money can't buy! She has appeared on mainstream TV, radio, and in countless press articles. She is the go-to girl you don't get access to, the kind that works with the rich, famous, and on occasion infamous!An expert's funny, brutal and downright ugly truth about dating do's and don'ts- with true client stories that will make you burst with laughter or even cry!Welcome to everything you need to know about how to bag the guy you've been waiting for!
Based on the cult @GalacticKeegan Twitter account, which has an engaged following of over 70k.Individual tweets regularly reach 2k likes, and often exceed 5k. The novel combines the sci-fi surrealism of The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy with the affectionate parody and football humour that make the account so beloved.
They're kooky, they're crazy-50 Relatives Worse Than Yours is a nightmarish family reunion that will have you appreciating your own weird clan. There's the Family Newsletter Publisher who keeps you updated on how Uncle Carl's hip is doing; there's Holistic New Age Aunt, who knows Madonna from Kabbalah class but refuses to introduce you because that would be bad karma; and there's Child Who Was in a National TV Commercial, who has more money than you do. And then there's Uncle Speedo, the Monopoly Bank Thief, and Your Son, the Tenant.
Filled with hilarious photographs and bullet points listing all their horrible characteristics, 50 Relatives Worse Than Yours is the perfect gift for anyone who's embarrassed by some members of their family, which let's just admit it is about everyone. And who knows, you might even recognize a relative or two...
Justin Racz is an advertising copywriter. He is the author of J.Crewd and 50 Jobs Worse Than Yours. He lives in New York City.
Praise for 50 Jobs Worse Than Yours:
"Take this humorous tour of the world's worst work."-Entertainment Weekly
"Justin Racz has done a tremendous service to us all with 50 Jobs Worse Than Yours, a work probably best kept on your job site for bad days."-Chicago Tribune
Also available: 50 Jobs Worse Than Yours hc 1-58234-492-2 ISBN-13: 978-158234-492-8 $14.95
U is for Unicorn: The ABCs of Silicon Valley is a game-changing alphabet book about the lingo of the tech industry. From Angel Investor to Napping Pod to Zero-Emissions Vehicle, this witty book explores the world of the San Francisco Bay Area one letter at a time. Featuring buzzwords like Cryptocurrency, Hoodies, Rest and Vest, Moonshots, and more, these are the ABCs and ideas that innovators—from infants to Xennials—need to onboard now.• Pairs funny, knowing illustration with rhyming verse for each crucial concept• Follows a team of five talented employees (and one scrappy and resourceful raccoon)• Explores Silicon Valley culture letter-by-letterDisruptors of all ages can Pivot to next-gen success as they scale their learning and crush it to become the thought leaders of tomorrow. U is for Unicorn proves that Silicon Valley is rooted not just in a place, but in a state of mind anywhere Java (code and coffee) is flowing.
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